I have made the choice

It was the day after my birthday, July 25th, 2008, and I woke up to the wonderfulness of Nauvoo air.

"Natalia, I couldn't fall asleep because all I could see in my head was you singing 'follow the butterflies, follow the butterflies!' while frolicking in a field."

That was the first thing Jessica said to me that morning, and I died of laughter right about then. That was the start to a grand day. July 25th, 2008 was one that will always be remembered with the Arkansas Gang. We had experiences there that only we can remember. It's one of those "you had to be there" moments.

We started off with Breakfast, a devotional, and splitting into groups. We all sat on the monkey bars before we had to leave, and took TONS of pictures. It was just a bunch of fun, sitting, talking... you know, the good stuff. Thomas, Jessica, David, Arielle, Emily, Jared, Ben, Alex, Rachel, Dereana, Alicia and I all started in a group with Brother Trotter, Bishop and Sister Scott as our parents for the day. We started by being driven to Nauvoo on our buses. This was one of those hilarious moments. Thomas and I were trying to bug each other to death, and so we'd knee each other, and tap on each other's arm and say "Natalia, Natalia, Natalia, Natalia!. . . It's a sidewalk." and point out a pointless sidewalk. It went vice versa too, me saying "Thomas, Thomas, Thomas!!" and he'd say "WHAT?!" And I'd say "It's my Father's house." and I'd point at the Nauvoo temple. And he turned and said "..That's MY Father's house TOO!" It was just a whole bunch of sillyness. Well, Sister Scott said that Thomas and I were being rejects, and that we didn't like her or any of the rest of our group who were in the back, because we were sitting in our original front row seats. So, Thomas and I turn to each other and are all "... lets go sit on Sister Scott." So, we did. Thomas ran up, and layed across her lap, and I sat across them.

While we were laughing and such, A few people started tying Mine and Thomas' shoe laces together... and they were successful, but they didn't tie a very tight knot. Thomas and I laughed about it, everyone just had a really good laugh at the whole situation. We then got off, and sat in our groups. Figuring out when we would all meet up with the other groups, and yadda yadda yadda. We ended up going to the Trail of Hope. The spirit was absolutely astounding on that trail. Tears were shed, hearts were softened, and our eyes, minds and hearts had gained a new understanding. We read of a people who suffered, and pressed forward, with faith and diligence. While walking down that trail, you have to wonder "How many of these people didn't even make it to the Salt Lake Valley?" It was hard to comprehend. But we were all there, and it was something shared between that group of us. It's not something you can replicate. You had to be there. And it's something we will always have together, one memory of a moment in time when we connected with the spirits of those who still wandered, and walked that trail with us.

We then went over to the Joseph Smith Memorial building thing? I don't remember the exact name. Inside, we found paintings, a miniature of Nauvoo set up, a miniature Temple, and other things. We got spots for the Joseph Smith Movie, and then headed to lunch. We had lunch in the West Grove. Pizza and Soda was our absolutely awesome meal. We had burping contests, and we had fun just being crazy, and taking crazy photos! It was such a good day, and the spirit was all around us. You could tell.

After lunch, our group, plus quite a few more, went and waited in line for the movie. The movie was amazing... We were all sobbing, and you could feel the benches shaking from all of us crying. It was indescribable. Nauvoo has a way of reminding you that no matter where you are, those who have past, are always around you. They had people on the top floor looking over the ledge of an open foyer of that building we were in. They were dressed in period clothes, and they waved if you did. They never said a word, but they let you know that they were there.

After the movie, we went to town, and went and bought fudge, then headed over to the ice cream shop. There was definitely a higher ratio of people then there were chairs. By this time, we had attracted a group of us larger than was able to sit at 2 or 3 tables in this ice cream shop. Sister Scott said "It's because you guys are awesome. You glow with the spirit, and you wreak of everything good. They're attracted to your light, and your spirits. You guys are amazing." And she was right. We ended up singing songs, laughing, making videos and had good laughs in that Ice cream shop. We even left a little note under their clear plastic table cloths. I wonder if it's still there? Our little piece of history, memory.. our piece of paper in that little shop.

We then waited in front of the temple to get a big stake pictures. We sang songs, harmonized, and loved it all. We got pictures taken, and we just... enjoyed it. We were scheduled to see the Nauvoo Pageant that night, so we were meeting up to go to that.

The NAUVOO PAGEANT. They had pre-show games that were old-time games.. potato sack races, stick pull, tug-o-war, Square dancing, and other games like that.

Thomas and I ended up Square dancing. We danced and danced, and even switched partners. And then they stopped, and all these bagpipers came and stood in the front and they yelled "They're going to play a few songs for us! But before they do, it's one of our bagpipers birthdays!" And then we all sang "Happy Birthday" to a bagpiper whose name I missed. But they played the song on the bagpipes! At the end I yelled "Hey! MY BIRTHDAY WAS YESTERDAY!" And the bagpiper was all "NO WAY!" And I was all "How old are you?!" Ane he said
"18!!!!" And I yelled "HEY! ME TOO!!!!" And then we high fived. And some guy in the little fiddle band on the stage yelled "Back off! He still has a mission to serve!" And I laughed and said "Haha, yyyeeaahh.. I'm never going to see him again." And the night continued. We ended up seeing the pageant, and it was amazing! At the very end, Joseph Smith is talking about how we're not alone here in Nauvoo, as he and other spirits still walk these streets with us.. and then the temple lit up, up on the hill.. and he said something about how the temple was the proof of our existence. That they did live, and they were all real.

Later, after Thomas, Jessica and I all cried our eyes out, we got pictures with people. Thats when I saw The Bagpiper and I said "Hey! Happy birthday, again!" And he said "Hey, you too!" and I walked away and thought "what an idiot. He probably thinks I'm a stalkerish girl. UGGH!" And I went and found Jessica. We ended up talking to Stephen, a guy who did tech, and we were talking to him about the show and such, and he asked where we were from. She said Arkansas, and I said Texas. He said "What part of Texas?" And I said "Ft.Worth." And he said "My roommate is from Texas!" and I got excited and asked "Oh really?! What part?" and he said "I don't know! Let's go ask him." We turn to go find his roommate, and lo and behold, the only person in SIGHT of where we were going, was THE BAGPIPER. And I stopped walking and thought "WHY HIM!!!!!! He's going to think I'm the creepiest person alive! WHY!" But I kept walking.. I walked up, and we figured out he was from Corpus Christi, 8 hours south of me. And we got to talking... and I had to leave, and ended up asking if he had a myspace or Facebook, and he said "I have a Facebook." And I said "Oh really... What's your name?" And I picked up his name bag around his neck and read "Robert.. Burke?..." And he said "Yep." And I asked "When do you get home?" And he said "August 13th. " And I swore I'd find him on Facebook.

On the walk back to camp, David, Thomas, Jessica and I got on the topic of Who would get married first. EVERYONE bet that I would get married first. "Your bagpiper will be waiting for you, Natalia!" Jessica teased.. I liked the teasing though. So it worked out. "I say Natalia. You'll be married within the next 3 years, and you'll be the first one married out of the gang." David said. And everyone agreed. I said "AHAHAHAHAHA!!!.. Not happening." We had good laughs, and good talks all the way back to camp. We were all sweating. It was 90 at night, and the humidity level was probably 80%. We were all gross. But it was during that pageant... that I knew with every fiber of my being, what was true. What I was enveloped in was not fake, it wasn't made up, it wasn't an illusion.

July 25th, 2008

I know this church is true, and so do you.

I know that Joseph Smith was and is a true and real prophet.

I know that everything happens for a reason, and that there are bigger plans in the bigger picture and scheme of things that I don't fully understand.

I know that my redeemer lives. He loves me and every single one of you too.

Never ever forget, or doubt that he does.

-Sister May

But one voice can still be heard

My story begins back in 2008. July 23rd, 2008 to be exact.

The evening of July 23rd was spent in Ozark, Arkansas. I was picking peas with Tim T. in his family's garden, and we ended up having a fight. Peas were flying everywhere, as Tim was singing as loudly as possible; "AND I DON'T WANT THE WORLD TO SEE ME, CAUSE I DON'T THINK THAT THEY'D UNDERSTAND!!!!! VINDICATED, I AM SELFISH I AM WRONG I AM RIGHT I SWEAR I'M RIGHT!!!. . ." with a little "JESUS WANTS ME FOR A SUN-PEA!!!" The fight ended after we both got too tired to throw anything anymore. We went inside, and enjoyed dinner, and then Thomas, David and I headed to Ft.Smith to meet up by midnight to head to Nauvoo, Illinois.

Me being in Arkansas wasn't weird, random, or seen as me running away. Arkansas was my 2nd home. If I wasn't in Arkansas, I was planning, working and going towards another visit; I loved it there.

I was invited to go to Youth Conference with them, because it was a Nauvoo trip, and I hadn't been since 2005. So we got to Ft.Smith, and Thomas was not feeling well, AT ALL. Thomas and I ended up sitting together on the front row seat of the charter bus, because we were the first ones on. And plus, Thomas was my absolute best friend. We had a blast staying up till all hours just talking about random stuff. At midnight, we both looked at each other and said "Happy Birthday!" and "It's my birthday!" at the same time. We became good friends with the bus driver, as he listened to everything we said. Mind you, Thomas and I were the ONLY ones in the front. All the adult leaders were behind and beside us, so it was quiet, and we could be retards about everything, and no one bothered us.

We finally fell asleep, but woke up when the bus stopped in Fayetteville to wait for the other 2 buses that were coming from Oklahoma. (The Ft.Smith Stake covers a HUGE area ranging from Arkansas to almost the middle of Oklahoma.) We waited, and finally we were on our way again. It wasn't hard to fall asleep again. But I woke up about 15 miles south west of St.Louis, so I knew we were only 45 minutes away from Nauvoo. By that time, I was awake, and aware. I couldn't wait! About 20 minutes out of Nauvoo, I had to go to the bathroom, and I wasn't about to crawl all the way to the back of the bus, to pee. So, I waited. And Thomas started waiting too. Here we were.. crossing the Mississippi, it was raining, and Thomas TOOK ADVANTAGE!!! "Wow... look at all the rushing water, Natalia. Hmm. I'll bet that would be nice to swim in. Hmm? Hmm. Yeah. Oh! Look at the rain on the windshield! Oh! Look. Look at all those puddles, and ponds.. Natalia! Natalia... Don't pee. Don't pee." I almost killed that child. So we decided to watch the GPS that our bus had, and count down the miles to our destination. It became a race to see who could call out the ".4, .3, .2, .1, 7 miles... .9, .8. . . "s before the other. When we FINALLY got there, we got word that our group was doing baptisms first in the Nauvoo temple. By the way, today was my birthday, so you could understand why I was ECSTATIC.. except we had to walk. In the rain, and it was kinda chilly. But we did baptisms! It was a glorious day, being there. We ended the evening having a devotional outside of the temple. But the lights weren't on. Down the hill, there was a stage with a huge field full of chairs, HUGE stadium lights shining.. and that was for the "Nauvoo Pageant". The temple wasn't lit for the pageant, which I'll explain later in another story.

Well, it was 9pm, and we were all singing church songs from our YC hand books that had schedules, songs, and journals. We got up to walk back to camp, as it was getting late, and we started singing "The spirit of God" and as we were ending that, we started on Come Come ye saints, and the lights to the temple started coming back on.. first the top floor, then the floors started lighting up, and then the outside lights were last. Everyone was sobbing. There are spirits that walk those hills, those streets, that city... that continually spread the gospel with their powerful presences. It's so hard to explain. But we all knew it. It was the best birthday I had ever had. Ever.

July, 24th 2008. My 18th birthday.

-Sister May